Sunday, July 10, 2005

Diminishing Need for Complaint

I think it's a good sign I haven't posted much in here. I actually have been *working.* No actual pages written, but lots of notes. Things are becoming more concrete. I fantasize about finishing and it doesn't seem so much like the impossible dream. Well, at least not some hours of the day. I have to finish by December. I have to! At this point I'm pretty sure they'll just take just about anything I write. Maybe they'll act a bit tough in the defense...but my advisor pretty much said they at this point just want ANYthing. Volume. So often I feel paralyzed because I think I have to get this perfect, I have to write everything there is to say about my subject and in a brilliant way. And that seems so unreachable. But right now, I'm actually considering writing some fluff. Hopefully it won't be inane fluff, but it might not be as theoretically complex as what I had previously envisioned, and maybe that's OK. I'm going to keep on writing. One page at a time. There is only one page to write. Just one.


Anonymous abd07 said...

When I first went back to school, I used to be paralyzed because I couldn't write a single word that wasn't perfect--and therefore couldn't write a single word period. One of my friends is a professor in a different field; she listened to me whine for endless hours, until finally one day she said: "It doesn't have to be perfect; it just has to be *done!" She was right, and it's a very useful mantra. It will always turn out better than you fear and worse than you hope; the trick is to stop worrying about the quality for a while and worry about the quantity instead. (You realize I'm actually talking to myself, I hope!) Good luck.

9:49 AM  
Blogger Porkorama said...

I have heard that so many times, but why does it not stick with me? I guess it's starting to stick for the first time actually. But what you say "it always turns out better than you fear and worse than you hope"--that is PERFECT (ahem). It is so, so true. OK...I'm getting to work. I will produce some beautiful mediocrity today and I will be proud!

1:50 PM  
Blogger Francesca said...

Yes! Do not get paralyized by perfection! It really is a sickness. Don't forget that you have another chance to perfect the research, after your defense, when you shop this out to be published.

It's good that you have a HAVE TO FINISH BY date now. In the spring, I finally set a date like that because I could see that I was dragging my feet. It totally worked to know that I was really going to disappoint myself if I didn't meet the deadline. What also helped was that the deadline was my 10th college reunion and I needed something to brag about! ;)

9:46 AM  
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